It’s a joke with a thousand variations. Mine will be, “How many retired pastors does it take to change a light bulb?” And the answer is, “One, so long as he has good WIFI.”

We’ve lived in our new house for four years now and are facing the first round of repairs and replacements. The battery in one of the smoke detectors began chirping incessantly a few weeks ago and one of the ceiling lights in the kitchen began flickering earlier this week. Battery and bulb replacement time.

Some of you know that I do not score high on mechanical aptitude tests and what is so simple as to hardly give it a second thought for some is a dreaded test of personhood and masculine worth for me.

Thank goodness for YouTube.

After years of trial and error, I am able to set up a step ladder without video assistance, but I don’t know what I would have done without step-by-step instructions on replacing the batteries and bulbs. Did you know that newer smoke detectors have these simple swing-out compartments for their 9-volt batteries?

And what could be simpler than changing a light bulb? Really, a YouTube video on changing a light bulb? How many people does it take? Well, let me say that simple is not in the vocabulary of changing an LED can light. In fact, no bulb involved. You swap out the entire fixture which is attached to the can by spring clips.  I would not have known what to do with those complicated devices had not my YouTube tutor taught me well.

Thank goodness for YouTube.

And thank goodness Amazon.  The local Home Depot did not have an exact match on can light fixtures (who wants a mismatched can light baffle on their kitchen ceiling?), but Amazon did.  It costs a lot more than a light bulb, however. I have a suggestion for the first issue to be addressed by the new price gouging commissar.

Yes, if it were not for a good WIFI connection and the ubiquitous YouTube and Amazon, we’d still be hearing incessant chirps from our smoke detectors and be seeing flickering light from the kitchen ceiling.

Plenty has been said and written about the destructive influence screens have had in our culture and especially on our kids. Jonathan Haidt’s The Anxious Generation is aptly titled. But can I say, “thank goodness for You Tube, Amazon, and WIFI”?

No one knows exactly where the phrase “moderation in all things” originated. The Greeks? The Victorians? Not the Bible, that’s for sure. Oscar Wilde famously said, “Everything in moderation, including moderation.” Maybe the moderate use of screens for learning how to change the smoke detector battery and the flickering kitchen light isn’t so bad. It relieved some anxiety, that’s for sure.

With apologies to Shakespeare, a light bulb by any other name? No. It was a major piece of electrical equipment, and I installed it myself. YouTube and I.