First, apologies to those who find nothing funny about the coronavirus. Neither do I, but, let’s face it, we are a funny species and humor is a gift that we need not neglect even in times such as these.

The Centers for Disease Control is doing its best to help us cope with virus. In addition to crawling into our caves, the CDC has told us to learn to cough and sneeze into our elbows and wash our hands for as long and as often as we can. Apparently, we are taking the hand washing advice seriously since we are buying soap by the case full and hand sanitizer by the gallon. I know a dark alley where you can score a bar of Ivory or a jar of Germ-X.

Assuming you have access to soap, you are supposed to wash your hands thoroughly for 20 seconds every time you think you may have touched the wrong surface, shook the wrong hand, or whatever.

My guess is that someone at the CDC must have signed up for a prayer vigil at their church. They know how long 20 seconds can be. Continue reading →